Kitten In Peril
Here lies some pictures from the wedding of my brother: flickr.com. And oh yes, watch out for Girlzilla!
Wytookie alert
In these times of peril, it’s good to know that FEMA is looking out for all of us.
This comes to you courtesy of Mr. Tall Dave.
Bad day at work
So I’ve got some interesting ideas on what to custom-print on toilet paper. You?
Crazy monkey surprise
Try the crazy monkey surprise!
I pretty much loathe Mel Gibson-directed movies. However, I’m intrigued by his Mayan-language Apocalypto, the new trailer of which is out. Which you should watch (the trailer, I mean), not just because I’m intrigued, but because about 6 frames before the monkey is a crazy surprise, not as totally related to the aforementioned monkey as I may have implied. This will not stop me from re-implying.
Hi sorry I’ve been away.
I got married! Here’s some pictures:
Wedding Setup
Wedding Proper
Reception
Schmeception
Afterwedding Baseballa
Disposocam!
Big Love
Jessica and I watched this tonight. A little racy for TV — the central joke of the first episode is that the husband needs Viagra — and I would say because of that not for Mormon consumption, but it wasn’t particularly heretical. They do make it clear, in dialogue and in a disclaimer at the end, that the characters, after all, aren’t “recommend” Mormons to begin with.
The show follows The Sopranos on HBO, and there’s definitely an attempt to turn Harry Dean Stanton’s patriarch character into a sort of Mormon mafia don, which they’ll need to preserve the audience lead-in. He’s not really that different from the press accounts of people like Rulon Jeffs, such as depicted in the Krakauer book, and I’m sure he’s modeled after him.
There are very few actresses I dislike more than Chloe Sevigny (really, there’s only Juliette Lewis and Sean Young, and neither seems to be working these days). I can’t really put my finger on why I hate her. Maybe because she’s a terrible actor — her affect is flat, her face a blank — and she always looks sleepy. I don’t really like Bill Paxton either. I don’t think either were terrible in this, and they won’t keep me from watching the show.
Some of the dialog seemed realistic Utahn. I was very happy they worked an “Oh my heck” in there, and the highlight of the first episode was a conversation between a regular Mormon teen trying to suss out what ward her chaste-but-polygamous coworker is in. “Are you in MIA Maids or Laurels?” Nobody actually sounds like they are from Utah, though. Everyone sort of talks like they’ve seen Raising Arizona a few too many times.
None of the polygamous characters wear garments. I thought that was weird, but maybe they don’t in real life. Anybody know?
In looking for polygamist reaction to the show, I found this: Principle Voices - What Do You Think of Big Love?. The first (and so far, only) response to the question has nothing to do with the show, but raises concerns about legalizing polygamy, and particularly polygyny, that hadn’t occurred to me: If people start practicing widespread polygyny, will it create a society of outcast angry loser men who can’t get women because all of the non-loser men will have snatched them up, so to speak, by the threes and fours?
An Alicante Car Hire Gets Asbestos Cancer
Benjamin was showing off. “Lydia, did you know that according to a website I found in my wanderings, there are many web advertisers that people pay more than $10 per click to get onto websites containing certain key words and phrases that begin with the letter ‘A’? When a websurfer clicks on a Google ad that contains one of these phrases, the webmaster of the site gets a substantial chunk of the monies.”
“Like, over 50%?” Lydia was dubious. It was her first time in an Alicante car hire, and certainly her first time in an Alicante airport car hire, so she probably wasn’t listening that closely anyway.
“I believe so. Definitely 40%, and I think as much as 70%, depending…” Benjamin kept talking, talking to try and forget his asbestos cancer, the same asbestos mesothelioma that got his mom. Geez. All that asbestos mesothelioma in his family — got his uncle and six of his anti-spam software-loving cousins, too, come to think of it — seemed like worlds away from here, now that Lydia and he were finally alone in their Alicante car hire.
“What’s on your mind, babe?” Lydia knew he was drifting. “I’m guessing you’re either thinking about your asbestos mesothelioma or anti-spam software, which I know you and your stupid cousins care about more than me. Not that your cousins should care about me at all, but don’t you think I deserve your attention?”
Suddenly her AT&T phone started to ring. “Hello?”
“Hello madam, have you to do any interest in auto cheap insurance?”
“What kind of wack English is that?”
“I apologize humbly. I am from Alicante, not so well is my English. However, you probable need auto cheap insurance, yes?”
“Buddy, I don’t care if you’re from the Alicante airport car hire. You have no right to call my AT&T phone like this. Ben, can’t your cousins make some anti-spam software for phones?”
“I dunno, baby snookums.” Ben snapped back to the present, the present of Lydia gabbing on her AT&T phone and careering wildly down mountain roads in her Alicante car hire car that she had hired for just such a purpose at the Alicante airport.
“Watch out! You almost hit that tree! Geez! I’m not sure that asbestos cancer is what’s gonna get me after all, if you keep driving like that. Didn’t you rent this car on your airlines credit card? It’s not like credit card auto insurance is all that great, you know.”
“I know, but I keep falling for the same old affiliate marketing scams,” said Lydia, slowing down and finally getting her Alicante car hire under control. “Everytime, I feel like something’s gonna make us rich, whether it’s some kind of adult friend finder, or buying up some available domain names, or maybe if we just accept credit cards for auto cheap insurance. Something.”
Benjamin was not as nonplussed as he had been. He was definitely plussing. “Me, I’m just slapping up a website, buying an available domain name, putting in some keywords, maybe doing some affiliate marketing, and bam. Money will pour in, I’m sure of it.” He grew pensive. “Hopefully, it’ll happen before the ol’ asbestos mesothelioma cancer kicks in.”
Giraffe Manor
This would be an awesome hotel for our honeymoon. Pricey, but awesome. Do not be foolish enough to confuse Giraffe Manor with Giraffeman, who is muscly, but awesome.
Tell everybody waitin’ for Giraffeman that they should try to hold on the best they can. He hasn’t dropped them, forgot them, or anything. They’re just too heavy for Giraffeman to lift.
